Are you fat?
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Funny
I am. And I've come up with a list of ways to tell if you are too.
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Can you use your gut as a portable table?
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You'd buy a sports car, but the thought of getting in and out of it deters you.
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Lose twenty pounds and no one even notices.
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You know what dunlap's disease is.
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Your belt is industrial grade, and not for decoration.
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You're six feet tall and have been turned away from a roller coaster.
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You've ever said, "Bacon's my middle name."